Go Hokies!

So the bloodshed at VT is all we have collectively been hearing about on the news since Monday. Rightfully so, a horrific and tragic event that has sent families into mourning, and students/educators/parents into an odd mixture of fear, guilt, and sadness. I have watched the images, the interviews. I have read the timelines, the eye-witness accounts and the commentary. However, I wonder why the need for the public "Monday morning quarterbacking" of all of our nation's media. I find it abhorrent that before the deceased were even publically named, television hosts were insinuating that the school had made the wrong choice by not going to lock down, by keeping campus open. Hindsight is 20/20 and during the initial period of grief and fear, it is completely inappropriate. I was so pleased with the articulate and thoughtful VT students who, when speaking to Matt Lauer, Anderson Cooper and the like, were quick to refrain from judgements against the schools decision-making process and quick to return the conversation to the positive aspects of the VT community. These students are the reason that VT will recover from this tragedy and once again thrive as a close-knit intellectual community.

My other thought in the midst of all of this is our response, particularly as educators and parents, to the warning signs exhibited by those who become school murderers. The media is clearly articulating that this particular murderer fit the tell-tale profile. A former professor of the shooter is now coming out to say that she had alerted officials and law enforcement to no avail. Again, doing some hindsight analysis, but how DO we as educators identify elements in our students that are beyond a "little odd". Is it within our understanding or training to recognize when a student is beyond "different" and in the realm of "psychopath". In an age where we are quick to label children for all sorts of disorders with all sorts of names (ADD, ADHD, ED, LD, BD, MR = IEP, LRE, 504 etc....)Are we reticent to admit to ourselves or our educational community that behavior that is anti-social can lead itself to that of violent? Are we fearful of labeling kids who demonstrate such behaviors for fear that we will further alienate their sensitive souls?

I do not have the answers, just merely the questions. At the end of this time to question, I shall continue to pray. For healing for the VT family, for patience and acceptance for those who which to judge the actions of the leadership, and for peace to the minds of troubled young men and women out there who see no other escape from their pain than to hurt others.

Peace of the Lord be always with you.

So this is what a hot dog feels like...

I wore my wetsuit for the first time today in water. It was an amazing floaty feeling! However, dry land in my wetsuit truly helps me understand what it must feel like to be a sausage or a hot dog. I think I may never be able to look at them the same way again!

Overcoming Fear

As I continue on this journey towards joining the pack known as Triathletes, I find myself having more and more mixed feelings. The perfectionist in me wants to be good at each sport right away and then build up to a semi-competitive state. However, the reality I must face is that on the bike, I down right suck. My muscles that propel me through the water and push me step by step on the road, just do not function the same when attached to 30 pound metal and chain contraption.

Sports psychologists (and regular ones for that matter) talk a lot about positive self-talks. There is even an article in Runner's World this month that talks about mantras. I think that if I'm telling myself I suck on the bike, of course I will suck on the bike. Then there is that whole fear of falling down.

My dear friend (a soon-to-be IRONWOMAN!) went for an easy ride with me this week and said "what will happen if you fall down?". I went on to describe that honestly, even my slow yet bloody and scary crash last summer wasn't all that bad, we still finished the ride. So what is it I'm afraid of exactly? The speed, the wind, the cars, the left turns from a complete stop? Why is it that my cadence is so incredibly slow?

Perhaps it is fear that if I work really hard at this that I will reach a level similar to that in swimming and running, where I have to work even harder to maintain mediocrity?

Perhaps it is not fear of failure, but rather fear of success?